how we get anger and how to control anger

Everyone gets angry on occasion. If you're experiencing overwhelming rage, though, it could be damaging your mental and physical health as well as your relationships with others. Uncontrolled anger can be indicative of underlying problems, such as anger management issues or mental disorder. It's important to control your emotions and calm yourself down for your own sake as well as for the sake of those around you.

                    Understanding Your Anger

1.Watch for physiological signs of anger.
Anger is certainly a psychological emotion, but it is also physiological, involving chemical reactions in your brain.When you get angry, your amygdala, the center for emotional processing, sends a distress signal to your hypothalamus, which sends epinephrine along your autonomic nervous system through the path of the sympathetic nervous system to the adrenal glands, which starts pumping epinephrine (adrenaline) throughout your body. The adrenaline gets your body ready to meet a threat, increasing your heart rate and sharpening your senses.

2.Take inventory of your emotions. 
Anger often masks another emotion; many times, anger is a secondary emotion to hurt, sadness, grief, depression, or fear. Anger emerges as almost a defense mechanism because it is easier for many people to deal with than the other emotions. Think about whether you allow yourself to feel a wide range of emotions or if you may be suppressing emotions that you think you “shouldn’t” feel.

3.Accept that anger can be a normal, healthy emotion. 
Anger is not always a bad thing. Anger can serve a healthy purpose by protecting you against continued abuse or wrongdoing.  If you perceive that someone is harming you, you will likely become angry, and that anger will prompt you to confront the person or end the harm in another way.

4.Watch for signs that your anger is out of control. 
While anger can be healthy, it can also be unhealthy. You may need to deal with an anger problem through self-help or professional help if the following are true:
Insignificant occurrences make you very angry, such as spilled milk and accidentally dropping an object.
When you’re angry, you display aggressive behaviors, including yelling, screaming, or hitting.
The problem is chronic; it happens over and over again.
You have an addiction, and when you are under the influence of drugs or alcohol, your temper gets worse and your behavior more violent.

                      Controlling Chronic Anger

1.Engage in physical activity.
 The endorphins that come from exercise can help you calm down, and moving your body provides a physical outlet for your rage: in this way, exercise can help in the moment of anger. However, maintaining a regular exercise schedule can also help you regulate your emotions in general. While you exercise, focus on thinking about the exercise and your body, not what has been on your mind lately. Some forms of exercise that might appeal to you and help you control your anger include:
Running/Jogging
Weight training
Cycling
Yoga
Basketball
Martial arts
Swimming
Dance
Boxing
Meditating

2.Get enough sleep at night.
 Most adults need at least 7-8 hours of sleep per night to thrive.Being sleep deprived can contribute to a wide range of health problems, including the inability to manage emotions properly. Getting adequate sleep can improve your mood and lessen your anger.
If you have chronic sleep problems, consult your physician. You may be able to make dietary or lifestyle changes to improve your sleep. You may also be able to try herbal or medicinal supplements to sleep more.

                     Controlling Anger in the Moment

1.Take a break as soon as you recognize that you're angry. 
You can take a break by stopping what you're doing, getting away from whatever is irritating you, and/or just taking a breather. Getting away from whatever is upsetting you will make it infinitely easier to calm down.
Remember that you do not have to respond to a situation immediately. You can count to 10 or even say “I will think about it and get back to you” to give yourself additional time to cool down as necessary.
If you're angry at work, go to a room or step outside for a moment. If you're driving to work, consider sitting in your car so that you're in a space you own.
If you're upset at home, go to a single-occupancy space (such as the bathroom) or for a walk or go for a walk with someone you trust or that can help you.

2.Let yourself feel angry.
It is perfectly normal to experience emotions such as anger.
 Allowing yourself a little time and space to feel angry may help you accept the anger and move on. Once you move on, you can stop returning to the anger and reliving the reason that you were angry.

3.Breathe deeply.
If your heart hammers with rage, slow it down by controlling your breathing. 
Deep breathing is one of the most important steps in meditation, which can contribute to controlling emotions. Even if you do not fully “meditate,” using deep breathing techniques can offer similar benefits.

4.Visualize a "happy place.
" If you're still having a difficult time calming down, imagine yourself in a scene you find incredibly relaxing. It could be your childhood backyard, a quiet forest, a solitary island or even in an imaginary land - any place that makes you feel at home and peaceful. Focus on imagining every detail of this place: the light, the noises, the temperature, the weather, the smells. Keep dwelling on your happy place until you feel completely immersed in it, and hang out there for a few minutes or until you feel calm.

5.Practice positive self-talk. 
Changing the way that you think about something from negative to positive (known as “cognitive restructuring”)can help you deal with your anger in a healthy way. After you have given yourself a moment to calm down, "discuss" the situation with yourself in positive and relieving terms.